Facing reality... again...

The second part of my story happened last night also. I was suppose to meet up with 2 old friends of mine whom last I have seen was early this year. At first, I agreed to meet them up in greenhills.

But I remembered making a promise to someone... So I declined. But for some reason, Teresa (not her real name) and Roy (not his real name) really wanted to meet up with me so they decided to go to my house.

They arrived when I was having a shouting match with Mau. They were shocked to see I was fighting with someone. When I saw them, I told Mau to wait and accommodated Teresa and Roy in the house and told them to wait for me and I'll explain to them what happened. It was really embarrassing.

I think after 20 minutes, Mau and Emmy left my house. I told my driver to buy a case of beer, San Mig Lights, because these two friends of mine would be mad if there are no alcohol to drink.

When I got back in, I saw Teresa reading one of the magazines in the living room and Roy was strolling back and forth, somewhat worried about my predicament awhile ago.

I greeted them with a forced smile (I was still pissed at Mau and Emmy) and sat down. We conversed for a little bit then my driver came back with the case of beer. We started drinking and for some reason, I calmed down a bit.

After telling my the stories of their lives, they asked about mine. I told them my life was boring, that nothing really great happened to me. Then I first told them my story about Jane... then about Abby.

As great listeners both were, they never interrupted even once in the 1 or 2 hours I told them about both. But they didn't care about what happened to Jane now. "Jane is past. There's no need to talk about her now," as Teresa said. Then when it came to Abby, here's our conversation went after I told them the story.

Teresa (T): Eggie, I think you're overdoing it.

Eggie (E): Overdoing what?

T: Those stuff you do for Abby. That's too much already. Even a girlfriend gets less than what you've given her now.

Roy (R): Eggie, what Teresa means is you have to stop doing this. If you really want to show love to her, there are other things you can do for her.

T: Abby is now in a twilight. She really doesn't need anything confusing in her life. That's what you're doing Eggie. Remember, you are not her boyfriend, much less her husband. And remember, there's still Kris in her life. Then there's this officemate of hers who's also making her confused. Even if she's almost given up on Kris, she still loves him and wants to give him one last chance. But what you're doing is confusing her.

R: Even though you don't mean it or you don't recognize it, you're pushing Abby, forcing her to do something that needs time to think. Sorry dude. I think the reason why she lied to you was because you're scaring her.

T: But don't think this is the end of this. I think Abby is really thinking about you. But I also thinks she needs space from you. There are too many things in her mind right now that she's putting you now in the least of her priorities.

R: I agree. So what you can do is take a look at yourself dude. Think again about your status in her life. Think about what you can do to actually help her. I don't believe what you're doing to her now is bad. You're just overdoing it.

T: Right now, she needs you more as that "Kuya Eggz" figure now than a distraction. If you can do that, then it will pave way to new paths for both of you. Believe me, she hasn't closed her door from you, it's just that she doesn't want you coming into hers now.

R: You love Abby. But you have to know where your limit is. If your reason of doing those things is because you're afraid of losing her, believe me, what you're doing is the quickest way to lose her.

T (now sitting beside me and putting an arm around me): It's not the end of the world Eggie. There are lots of girls in this world if it's not meant to be. But don't lose hope now. There's still a chance but now is not the time to think about that.

R (smiles): For now, why don't you fix things in your life now? Surely you have lots of problems now.

T: Yes, try to do that first and be a better Eggie to her.

R: You know the rest already so we don't really need to say it to you.

Then Teresa told me something I can't say now. But it really made my heart pound hard.

After a case of beer, 1 bottle of red wine and a bottle of vodka (both were brought by them) Roy and Teresa went home.

I drank a lot yesterday but for some reason, I wasn't feeling tipsy or anything. I thought really hard about about Roy and Teresa had to say to me. I cried.

I knew I was wrong without ever noticing it. It was like I was choking Abby. Then I prayed to God for some guidance. I really need some answers that time. And I slept around 6am.

Around 8am, I woke up and knew what I had to do. I texted Abby again to apologize. No reply. It hurt that she didn't but I guess.. Then I started re-thinking about the things. What went wrong and stuff.

And I finally found the answer..

I don't want to this but I guess I really need to. If her happiness means so much to me, then I'll do it, even if it costs mine..

Yes, I really facing reality again..